Mar 11, 2019
Organization, Two Homes
Every parent knows all too well the morning chaos as the family needs to get out the door to start the day. Your child is slow moving or forgot to pack a lunch and complains about a queasy stomach. This is a good day. Add separation and divorce to the mix and stress tolerance becomes lower, frustration and impatience high. The morning chaos verges on a battle. Making sure your children have everything they may need at their other house adds to the confusion.
You ask yourself what did you forget? Medication is the one and only essential, we can miss other things such a a nighttime stuffed buddy or cleats. The discovery of the missing item may occur after you’re on route or long after the child is at the co-parent’s home. Regardless of when you learn of the problem, it interrupts your schedule, and can cause conflict between you and your co-parent if not handled well.
Your first response must be to question whether they need the item. If the missing item will affect your co-parent’s peace (all parents know it can not replace a nighttime buddy) or your child’s health, then the item must get to your child. Since the item was forgotten on your watch, it is your responsibility to bring the item to your child wherever they may be. If you and your co-parent agree that the item is not needed then all is well.
Although it is important to teach children responsibility for their things, it is not your children’s choice to live in two homes. Remembering your things when you’re a kid is hard enough when you live in one place. Save the lessons for taking responsibility on the days they aren’t going to their other house.